IBA 2.0 Part-1

My so-called 3 month long summer internship came to an end on 18th of June 09' as i boarded the train back to Bangalore. It was a remarkable period in my unremarkable life. I started my SIP, with a lot of hopes and dreams for the coming period. But how it eventually turned out is unreal. My initial burst of energy slowly faded away and i switched back to my old ways of lying in front of the PC all day long and trying to entertain myself with orkut, facebook, movies and games, which was very UN-ENTERTAINING to say the least. The only spark was the end of the day talk with a special someone (from my side atleast) and day-dreaming about the future, ignoring the reality. But that chapter came to an end when i opened my stupid mouth and blurted out my feelings. The aftermath was quite obvious. The happy days were over and reality was staring at my face. I retreated back to my cave. But I couldnt hide away forever. So i turned up the volume of the outside world, hoping that the noise outside would drown the pain inside. It worked well when i was around with friends and family, but nobody can reach inside and make the pain go away. More about THAT some other time.

I found my coach and settled down. Some of my college friends were on the train too, had to say HII and all, just to be nice. Honestly i couldnt care less, but the NICE GUY SYNDROME takes over. They gave me a lot of shitty news, more classes, more assignments and a lot of other scary speculations. I had a sinking feeling inside and a part of me wanted to run away. But i carried on, (AS IF I HAD A CHOICE). I excused myself after an hour of fake laughing and college dissing. I slept off the rest of the journey, a better use of my time than wasting on people. But i was restless; due to obvious reasons. I had to figure out what to do with the TIME(not LIFE) thats ahead of me. So I Chalked out some plans, wrote it in my pocket diary, never to be opened again for sure, but had to do it to make myself feel better. Uncertainty clouds my reasoning, which breeds chaos.

Thats all for now.